It is essential that in counselling those involved in adoption that therapists take into account the adoption circle as a whole and the ways in which all members remain part of each other’s worlds in fantasy or reality over the course of their lifetimes. Everyone needs to be allowed to express their thoughts and feelings about these significant people in their lives, who otherwise remain as ghostlike figures. As each of the members of the adoption circle go along their own developmental course there will be times when individual issues will relate and have impact on other members of the adoption circle. The themes of loss and anger, attachment and separation and identity formation will be common to all.