The sense of self is inextricably connected to language, itself an intrinsically collective phenomenon with a life independent of individuals. If feeling provides an internal value system for self, then language can be thought of as providing an external value system, variably appropriated by individuals. Language consists of a network of differences; of relations within its own network; of shades of meaning. Its living qualities provide a gateway to “forms of life”. Communicative exchanges begin within a largely affective, indexical context: the proto-conversation.
This can be usefully thought of as the “first language” in development. The nature of this stage of experience will influence the manner in which verbal language is acquired: either as a vehicle for imagination and play; or as a pragmatic tool of instrumental value (or both). The development of self in adults is enhanced by an iterative form of conversation involving recognition, renewal and the fostering of imagination. This conversation has the structure of something “given” by the self; and something “new” added by the “other”. As a living process this implies growth, spiralling in exchange with the environment.